Mumble jumble

The Boy and I have enjoyed the nice long bank holiday weekend. We saw good friends on Friday and Saturday, and then had Sunday and Monday together as quiet time. We've worked out that we need a balance of public and private time to help us along, to ensure we stay strong, and to keep us on more of an even keel. The weekend was mostly enjoyable, but the Boy and I have both lost our way a little bit at times and my mind is a bit of a 'mumble jumble' today.

Sunday was a difficult day for the Boy, and I felt really sad yesterday and slept terribly as a result. I think I managed about three hours of kip in between nightmares and worry. I was never that great at remembering dates and appointment times during the (short) pregnancy, but now I seem to have an internal calendar that peeps up and reminds me of our loss on our regular basis. Dates and anniversaries feel so painful. Yesterday it was a month since our tiny, tiny little baby Beans was delivered in hospital. I seem to have aged many years since then. As I've said in previous entries, in some ways it feels like a lifetime ago and I struggle to remember a time we weren't pregnant or thinking about the baby, at other times the wounds still feel so fresh and raw that it could have happened yesterday. I wonder, since then, how many other women have had their miscarriages managed in that same room in St Thomas's Hospital I was in, and how many other couples have had their dreams shattered and experienced the painful loss.

Tuesdays I find especially difficult as they remind me that our baby - if it had lived - would have been another week older, and we would have been another week closer to meeting him or her. Today our baby would have been 18 weeks old. Almost halfway there... I try not to dwell on what might have been, but I think it's natural to remember, contemplate and imagine. I'm sure I would have had a bump by now; I might even have felt a kick. The stronger, negative and dark feelings like my anger, envy and resentment seem to have dissipated and ebbed away over the last week or so, but there remains a terrible sadness. It's underlying all the time, but in a quiet and unassuming way. It's only when I let myself remember and indulge myself in thinking about what has happened that it begins to roar again. And it's right that I stay with that feeling for a time, for as long as I can manage. I need to, to ensure I can go forwards and be able to bear and live with what has happened. I don't want to be someone who months and months down the line bursts into tears at the news of a friend's pregnancy or a baby advert. I want to do my best to process what is happening and allow the feelings I have about what has happened to be a part of my life that I can tolerate and absorb.

I think it's difficult now that we have definitely decided to try again. I have some guilt about moving on and that fact that I do feel ready to do this, at what I perceive to be quite an early stage since our baby died. I know my baby meant the absolute world to me and the Boy and we couldn't have loved it anymore than we did, but I don't want to take anything from our baby's memory or its importance to us. I fear that if we fall pregnant again people will think we are 'over' what happened and that somehow it wasn't that bad or painful. We're certainly survivng, and I believe we're doing really well, but it's been a very dark experience that I wouldn't wish on anyone and I hope all my friends and family are shielded from it. It has been a really horrendous time and a future baby wouldn't be a replacement, it would be a younger sibling for the baby we lost. We'll never forget. But we can forgive what has happened and allow ourselves to let go - we have no choice.

There is also some anxiety about how my body will work again. As I say, it's been a month now since our little tiny baby arrived. We were told my normal cycles would resume in 4-6 weeks, so I await my 'lady' with both trepidation and optimism. There is fear because I haven't had a period since January, and it will be another physical confirmation and reminder that I'm not pregnant and we must beging the 'trying' process again. But also optimism because hopefully my body will have settled back into its normal routine and we have every reason to hope and believe I can get pregnant again and this time the outcome could be different. We go into trying for another baby wiser than we were before. We know when is the best time to be intimate, and we know the road ahead to be a bumpy one. We're aware our dreams may not be realised, but we are also aware that it's worth the risk of being blessed with a child, and the alternative for us isn't really an alternative.

So I feel a little out of sorts still today. I am a 'mumble jumble' of anxiety, guilt - but also hope. There are going to be new feelings for me over the coming weeks and months and there will be more reminders, more dates, more sadness. But also I'm sure more happiness - and more hope.

Happy Memorial Day Weekend

For many, this weekend marks the end of school and the beginning of summer.  It's also the first official work holiday since New Year's.  For me, it's just been nice to be at home with absolutely no plans.   I've spent the past two days working in the yard, cleaning up flower beds, weeding, mulching, trimming, etc.  It's been nice to throw in some grilling and relax time too.   I wish I had some pictures of poppies to share with you for Memorial Day but instead, I'm sharing pictures from my recent visit to the Wooden Shoe Tulip Farm to enjoy the Tulip Festival in Woodburn, Oregon. 

Girls just wanna have fun

Last night two of my closest girlfriends, who were both bridesmaids for me at my wedding last year, came round to Empire Towers. It's the first time I've seen friends of an evening since the miscarriage, and it did me the world of good - although I am paying for it now! 

The three of us are very close, we all met while working together at a children's charity. It was fantastic to see them and talk properly in the safety and security of my own home. It's been a fair while since the three of us were together so there was a lot of news to catch up on. I had been nervous about how I wo

A month on

It's hard to take in, but today it is a month since we found out our baby Beans had died. I'm not sure where the time has gone, although in some ways it feels like it all happened longer than a month ago. At other times it feels like it was only yesterday.

It's been quite a month, with lows that I never could have imagined I would feel, a sadness I didn't believe was bearable, and a depth of pain I didn't realise existed. There have been moments when I've wondered how the Boy and I would survive, days sat in front of my computer at work using all my energy to keep the tears inside, and nights riddled with nightmares and unrest.

At first I felt the wound so keenly - there was a real physical pain inside of me that throbbed and burned, and I couldn't escape it as much as I wanted to. It needed to be felt. My arms ached to hold a baby, my whole being wanted to smell, sense, and feel a baby, our baby. I felt so angry and frustrated at what we had lost, wanting someone to blame when there was no one. Wanting to make sense of a situation that lacked any logic. Envious of those who had children or were pregnant, not through any malice but so desperately wishing things were different for me and the Boy. It was very difficult to begin to let go - to stop torturing myself with 'what ifs' and 'if onlys'. A month on I still feel myself at times wanting to go down that path, but I can generally pull myself back. The detours are unhelpful and cause me undue grief - the journey ahead is already difficult with hurdles and obstacles enough without being sidetracked.

But we have also had some good times, and yesterday brought a sense of closure to the process for me. As painful as it has all been, I feel able to start to move on. I am haunted by the image of the Boy carrying our baby's coffin - a sight I never imagined I would see, and an experience I wish the Boy had never been through. But at last we are all at peace. Our baby is buried with other lost babies for company, and won't be moved any more. We can all rest now. And the boy and I can be brave and strong for our baby, and begin to live our lives again.

The baby has left us quite a legacy - only with us for 13 weeks, but from its death we have learned many things. We know how loved we are by family and friends, and what sympathetic and kind colleagues and employers we both have. We know we can make a baby, and we know I can deliver one. We know how much we want a family, and how any sacrifices we make for this will be so worth it and so much better than the alternative. But most of all, as I've said so many times in these entries, I have a renewed, heightened and more intense love for my husband. In the short time it was with us, the baby awakened a new side of me, and I have a greater capacity for love than before. And that love has gone to the Boy. He has shown himself to be every bit the man I knew he was, but also a whole lot more. I've been there with him in a dank, dark place when we've been tested and tortured, and we've walked out of that dark place together, stronger, braver... somehow just 'more' than we were before.

Going forwards will take time, I know from my work as a bereavement counsellor that there will be many difficult days ahead. We will be reminded of our loss when we least expect it; a word, conversation, experience, picture, date or song can transport us back to that dark place with the click of a finger. And that will be hard to deal with. More tests lie ahead, as friends announce their pregnancies and extend their families, and we must find the courage within ourselves to separate their happy news from our loss, and to be joyful and proud for them. And the greatest challenge of all I suspect will be if we find ourselves pregnant again - how will we cope with the nerves and anxiety, and manage our fears? Will it bring back all the memories of our first dear baby? What will we do if we find ourselves here again? Can we live through another loss as well as we have this time? Is our relationship strong enough to be tested again? I think I know the answers to these questions, but we won't know for sure until we are in that position.

I know I have so much more work to do. I'm not yet able to read back through the posts on my blog to when I was pregnant. It's still too upsetting for me to recall how happy and excited I was. That will come with a bit more time I think. But I am sure it will come. I have hope and faith in the future, and I have sublime love. And I am reminded of the Corinthians reading we had at our wedding and I take heart and strength from the words: "And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love".

Wish I Were Attending the 2011 Beirut Music & Art Festival!

I'll be posting pictures soon but we are so excited that my daughter Mimi was invited to perform at the Beirut Music & Arts Festival!   She arrived late last night our time, after nearly 24 hours of travel.  After getting a good night's rest, she started rehearsing this afternoon.  Two weeks of incredible music every night.  

P.S.  I'm not proud!

Rest in peace

So today we laid our little baby Beans to rest. It was a very surreal, but also a very gentle and peaceful, day. And once again the sun beamed down on us. The Boy and I were anxious as we approached the funeral directors - not sure what to expect and fearful that we could contain our emotions.

We arrived early so spent some time in the memorial gardens before it was time for our service. It felt sad looking at all the plaques and plots, but I have never seen a garden so well tended or a burial area with so very many flowers. The place felt calm and quiet, but full of love. Reading the tributes that had been left I felt sure our baby would be safe here. The Boy and I felt a small sense of comfort in finding people buried there with our surname - perhaps they will look out for our baby for us. It was interesting to see Jade Goody, the Big Brother celebrity, was also buried there. Perhaps she too can take care of baby Beans while we cannot.

When we were greeted at reception we were taken to a private room to wait for the minister. The lady asked us if either of us would like to carry our baby's coffin which caught us both by surprise and I immediately felt the lump in my throat form and the tears prick at my eyes. The Boy without hesitation said he would and I looked at him, once again bowled over with pride and love at the strength and honour of the man I married. He is immense.

The father came to greet us and asked if we had any readings. The Boy and I had settled on Little Snowdrop and I felt I wanted to at least attempt to read it. I was unsure if my emotions would get the better of me. Slowly we made our way outside and the Boy was given the coffin to carry to the memorial garden. A beautiful white box with 'Baby Gibson' written on it. We made our way steadily and soon arrived at our plot, on the north side of the garden. The funeral director handled the box with such care, wrapping it in dark red velvet while the father read the blessings and prayers. I managed the reading, and felt very proud of doing it - I was proud of us. Our baby leaves this world carried by its father and honoured by its mother. We will miss baby Beans very much. The minister blessed the coffin and the Boy and I stroked the box, saying a last tender goodbye, before it was gently placed in the plot.

It was a very gentle service and the Boy and I - so far - feel it was very beautiful, and a perfect and apt way to say a final goodbye. I liked the memorial garden - almost next door to where Michael Caine grew up - and I will go back and see our baby from time to time, on special dates. Wherever we live the fact it is so near central London means we will always be able to visit our first born Beans. We feel a sense of underlying sadness and loss that I imagine will be there for some time, but we also feel a sense of peace. It feels like we have now left baby Beans to rest, and while we will never ever forget, we can all begin to sleep a little more easily.

7 Wonders of the bangladesh.

#1 Cox's Bazar(world's longest sea beach)
Cox's Bazar  is a town, a fishing port and district headquarters in Bangladesh. It is known for its wide sandy beach which is the world's longest natural sandy sea beach. It is an unbroken 125 km sandy sea beach with a gentle slope. It is located 150 km south of Chittagong. Cox’s Bazar is also known by the name "Panowa", the literal translation of which means "yellow flower". Its other old name was "Palongkee". The modern Cox's Bazar derives its name from Captain Cox (died 1799), an officer serving in British India. In the 18th century, an officer of British East India Company, Captain Hiram Cox was appointed as the Superintendent of Palongkee outpost after Warren Hastings became the Governor of Bengal. Captain Cox was specially mobilised to deal with a century long conflict between Arakan refugees and local Rakhains. The Captain was a compassionate soul and the plight of the people touched his heart. He embarked upon the mammoth task of rehabilitating refugees in the area, and made significant progress. A premature death took Captain Cox in 1799 before he could finish his work. But the work he had done earned him a place in the hearts of the locals and to commemorate his role in rehabilitation work a market was established and named after him as Cox's Bazaar ("Cox's Market"). Although Cox's Bazar is one of the most visited tourist destinations in Bangladesh, it has yet to become a major international tourist destination, due to lack of publicity.
The beach
The main attraction of Cox's Bazar is the long sandy beach that stretches from the mouth of the Bakkhali river going all the way to Teknaf. Although commonly known as Cox's Bazar beach, it stretches far beyond the area designated as Cox's Bazar town.

#2 Sundarbans(Mangrove forest)
The Sundarbans is the largest single block of tidal halophytic mangrove forest in the world. The name Sundarban can be literally translated as "beautiful jungle" or "beautiful forest" in the Bengali language (Sundar, "beautiful" and ban, "forest" or "jungle"). The name may have been derived from the Sundari trees that are found in Sundarbans in large numbers. Alternatively, it has been proposed that the name is a corruption of Samudraban or Chandra-bandhe (name of a primitive tribe). But the generally accepted view is the one associated with Sundari trees.The forest lies in the vast delta on the Bay of Bengal formed by the super confluence of the Ganges, Brahmaputra and Meghna rivers across Saiyan southern Bangladesh and West Bengal, India. The seasonally-flooded Sundarbans freshwater swamp forests lie inland from the mangrove forests on the coastal fringe. The forest covers 10,000 sq.km. of which about 6,000 are in Bangladesh. It became inscribed as a UNESCO world heritage suite in 1997, but while the Bangladeshi and Indian portions constitute the same continuous ecotope, they are separately listed in the UNESCO world heritage list as the Sundarbans and Sundarbans National Park, respectively. The Bangladesh part of the Sundarbans is estimated to be about 4,110 km², of which about 1,700 km² is occupied by waterbodies in the forms of river, canals and creeks of width varying from a few meters to several kilometers.The Sundarbans is intersected by a complex network of tidal waterways, mudflats and small islands of salt-tolerant mangrove forests. The interconnected network of waterways makes almost every corner of the forest accessible by boat. The area is known for the eponymous Royal Bengal Tiger (Panthera tigris tigris), as well as numerous fauna including species of birds, spotted deer, crocodiles and snakes. The fertile soils of the delta have been subject to intensive human use for centuries, and the ecoregion has been mostly converted to intensive agriculture, with few enclaves of forest remaining. The remaining forests, pain together with the Sundarbans mangroves, are important habitat for the endangered tiger. Additionally, the Sundarbans serves a crucial function as a protective barrier for the millions of inhabitants in and around Kolkata against the floods that result from the cyclones that are a regular occurrence on this coast. Sundarbans have also been enlisted amongst the finalist in the New7Wonders of Nature.

#3 St. Martin's Island
St. Martin's Island is a small island in the northeast of the bay of bengal, about 9 km south of the Cox's Bazar-Teknaf peninsular tip and forming the southernmost part of Bangladesh. It is about 8 km west of the northwest coast of Myanmar at the mouth of the river naf. The island lies between 92°18´ and 92°21´E longitudes and 20°34´ and 20°39´N latitudes. The local people call it Narikel Jinjira. It is almost flat and is 3.6m above the mean sea level. The 9.66 km wide channel between the mainland and the island is much shallower than the open sea southwest of the island. There are reefs from 10-15 km to the west-northwest.The island is 7.315 km long and is aligned NNW and SSE. Geographically, it is divided into three parts. The northern part is called Narikel Jinjira or Uttarpara and is 2,134m long and 1,402m wide. The southern part is known as Dakshinpara, which is 1,929m long, with a narrow tail of 1,890m towards the southeast, and a maximum width of 975m. A narrow central belt or Maddhyapara connects the two parts. The length and the width of this belt are about 1,524m and 518m respectively and the narrowest collar is known as Golachipa. In addition to the main island there are a number of tiny islets ranging from 100 to 500 sq m which are locally known as Chheradia or Siradia which means separated island.There is a shallow lagoon in the middle of Uttarpara and it is connected to the sea during high tide by a narrow channel on the western coast. The topsoil of Uttarpara consists of alluvial sands mixed with shells of molluscs. There are two small dead lagoons and a stretch of marshy land in Dakshinpara. Fish landing sites, bazars and schools are present only in Uttarpara.Launches and country boats ply between the island and teknaf regularly. The population is about 3,700 and most of them are fishermen belonging to 535 families. One hundred eighty-two species of wildlife are recorded from the island. Of these, 4 species are amphibians, 28 reptiles, 130 birds and 20 mammals. tourism to the northern part of the island exists during four months (November to February). The most densely populated part is Jinjira. There is scarcity of sweet water on the island. Only a few ponds and a number of tubewells supply sweet water for drinking as well as for cultivation. Though the island falls in the monsoon zone, the climate is much influenced by the sea. The main vegetation is coconut, betel nut and bamboo. Coconut trees are abundant and more concentrated in the Jinjira area. The soil of the island is not so fertile. The main agricultural products are onion, watermelon and some rice.The geological structure of the island is simple and is represented by an anticlinal uplift. A little of the axis of the anticline is traceable along the west coast of Dakshinpara. The exposed portion of the axis runs NNW to SSE, approximately parallel to the island. There is a fault along the northwestern shoreline with a trend nearly parallel to the axis. St Martin's limestone is composed of molluscan coquina horizons (shelly limestone) and coral clusters (coralline limestones). Being very porous and permeable, the shelly limestone provides an excellent aquifer wherever they occur beneath the alluvium. Recent marine sands and the shelly limestone are the chief source of fresh water.Several living small coral colonies are found in small sheltered pools very near the low tide level around the island. They also occur in the surrounding shallow sea, mostly growing on the beach rocks and calcareous sandstone concretions. The dead coral colonies also occur in pool-like depressions within the high and low tide levels. Some of them are located at an elevation of nearly 3.50m above the low tide level. The oldest fossil coral belongs to Late Pleistocene, giving an age of 33,238 years (C14 dating). The clearest indication of the Holocene upliftment of the island is the appearance of an emerged 3.0m coquina limestone cliff on the coast of Dakshinpara ranging in age from 450 years at the base to 292 years at the top (C14 dating). The mean uplifting rate of the island, calculated from the above data, is 19.0 mm/year. The location of the cliff is 1.5m above the present high tide level and on the eastern upthrown faulted block.The emerged dead corals characterised by Porites sp, Acropora sp, Cyphostrea sp, and Platygyrn sp provide evidence of lower level emergence, ie, they have been raised above the level at which they are at present forming/living. The radiocarbon dates from emerged dead corals are recorded below the ultra low level liquid scintillator's detection limit (ie 0 BP). This suggests that the dead corals have emerged fairly recently, indeed are still in the process of emerging. This means that the environment of St Martin's Island is now not favourable for the growth and development of the only coral island of the country that started forming at least since the last maximum glacial age (ca 40,000 years ago).

#4 Kuakata
Kuakata (Bangla: কুয়াকাটা) is a panaromic sea beach on the southernmost tip of Bangladesh. Located in the Patuakhali district, Kuakata has a wide sandy beach from where one can see both the sunrise and sunset. It is about 320 Kilometres south of Dhaka, the capital, and about 70 Kilometres from the district headquarters. The Kuakata beach is 30 km long and 6 km wide. On 13 September 2007 government had announced a red alert in Kuakata as caution for a possible Tsunami.The name Kuakata originated from the word 'Kua'-the Bengali word for “Well” which was dug on the sea shore by the early Rakhine settlers in quest of collecting drinking water, who landed on Kuakata coast in the eighteenth century after being expelled from Arakan (Myanmar) by the Mughals. Afterwards, it has become a tradition of digging Well in the neighborhoods of Rakhaine tribes for water.Kuakata offers a full view of the sunrise and sunset from the same white sandy beach in the water of the Bay of Bengal.Locally known as Shagor Kannya (Daughter of the Sea), the long strip of dark, marbled sand stretches for about 30 km. The long and wide beach at Kuakata has a typical natural setting. This sandy beach has gentle slopes into the Bay of Bengal. Kuakata is also a sanctuary for migratory winter birds.On the eastern end of the beach is Gongamati Reserved Forest, an evergreen mangrove forest and snippet of the original Kuakata. When the Rakhines settled in the area in 1784, Kuakata was part of the larger Sundarbans forest. However, the Sundarbans is now at a distance of one-hour by speed boat. As a mangrove forest, Gongamati, like the Sundarbans, offers some protection against tidal surges, however it too is being threatened by logging and deforestation. The best way to reach the forest is by foot or bike along the beach, where a flock of flag flying fishing boats can be seen trawling the coast. Choosing to visit Gangamati in the late afternoon is a perfect time to watch the sun caste shadows on the abstract exposed mangrove roots.Kuakata is the place of pilgrimage for both Hindu and Buddhist communities. Innumerable devotees arrive here at the festival of 'Rush Purnima' and 'Maghi Purnima'. On these two occasions the pilgrims take holy bath at the bay and participate in the traditional fairs. One may also visit the 100 years old Buddhist Temple where the statue of Goutama Buddha and two wells of 200 years old are located.Fisherman village is another place where you can visit and watch the lifestyle of the fisherman. If you are adventurous you may also go for fishing on the fishing boat if you can manage the local fishermen. That will give you pleasure and experience, which you won’t be able to gather from anywhere else. In the fishermen village you will find the fishermen coming back from the sea and you can purchase some fresh hilsha fish from them, and by the side of village there are some local restaurants where you can get the Hilshas cooked and ready for eating.The government and local business owners have made significant developments over the years to attract tourist to its shores. Nowadays, local people are more supportive to the tourists and communications have improved significantly. A new Police station was built in 2007. Accordingly, the law and order situation in the open beach, even at night, has improved significantly.

#5 Chittagong
  please click Chittagong  in my blog archive to know more.   
Patenga beach
Patenga Beach is a popular tourist spot. The beach lies approximately twenty kilometers outside the city of...
Foy's Lake
Foy's Lake is a human-made lake in Chittagong, Bangladesh. The lake....
Kaptai Lake
Kaptai Lake is a man-made lake in south-eastern Bangladesh.....


#6 Dhaka city(capital of Bangladesh)

please click Dhaka in my blog archive to know more.

#7 Sylhet city.
please click sylhet in my blog archive to know more.

Story Corps Atlanta

Have you shared your story? Tonight I went to hear stories about immigration at the Auburn Avenue Research Library in Atlanta. WOW! I laughed, and cried. I nodded my head in agreement, and shook my head in disbelief. I heard stories of amazing people from more than a dozen countries some documented, and some not, but all who shared their stories of coming to America, and what it has meant to them.

Many thanks to WABE 90.1 fm, Atlanta's Public Radio and The Community Foundation for Greater Atlanta for keeping Story Corps Atlanta going through the end of the year.  

If you have a story to tell, make an appointment.

Poetry in motion

I feel a little thrown as I write this, as the father who is conducting the funeral tomorrow has left me a message asking if there are any special readings we would like at the service, and if so to bring them along. I hadn't thought of preparing anything, which leaves me feeling a little guilty and I'm concerned what else I might have forgotten. And while I'm impressed with the hospital's level of care for us, I'm a bit overwhelmed by the detail that is going into the funeral. I'm not sure it's entirely appropriate for the Boy and I - but perhaps it may become more so in time.

There are two poems that I have read since we lost baby Beans, which have made me think about our lovely baby in a happier light. Perhaps we can use one of them for the reading. I will discuss this with the Boy this evening and see what we would find the most useful. My heart aches with sadness and loss when I read the poems in my head, so I am fearful how hard tomorrow will be. But I suppose it must be thus, to let us mourn, say goodbye, and begin to walk out of the shadows and into the light once again.

Little Snowdrop
The world may never notice if a snowdrop doesn't bloom,
Or even stop to wonder if the petals fall too soon.
But every life that ever forms or even comes to be
Touches the world in some way for all eternity.

The little one we longed for was swiftly here and gone,
But the love that was then planted is a light that still shines on.
And even though our arms are empty, our hearts know what to do.
Every beating of our hearts says that we both love you.

Gone Too Soon
This was a life that hardly begun.
No time to find your place in the sun.
No time to do all you could have done.
But we loved you enough for a lifetime.

No time to enjoy the world and its wealth.
No time to take life down off the shelf.
No time to sing the song of yourself,
Though you had enough love for a lifetime.

Those who live long endure sadness and tears,
But you'll never suffer the sorrowing years.
No betrayal, no anger, no hatred, no fears,
Just love, enough love for a lifetime.

Reading

I feel a little bit thrown as I write this, as the Father who is conducting the funeral tomorrow has left me a voice message asking if there are any special readings we would like, and if so to bring them along. I hadn't thought of preparing anything which leaves me feeling a little guilty. I'm concerned now what else I might have forgotten. And while I'm so impressed with the hospital's level of care, I feel a bit overwhelmed by the detail that is going into the funeral. I'm not sure it's entirely helpful for the Boy and I - but I suspect it may become more so in time.

There are two poems I have read since we lost the baby, which have helped me to think about baby Beans in a happier light. Perhaps we can use one of them for the reading... I will discuss this with the Boy when we are both home from work tonight and see what we would find most useful and appropriate. My heart aches with sadness and loss when I read the poems in my head, so I am fearful how sad tomorrow will be. But I suppose it must be thus, to let us mourn, say goodbye, and begin to walk out of the shadows and into the light once again.

Little Snowdrop

The world may never notice if a snowdrop doesn't bloom,

Or even pause to wonder if the petals fall too soon.

But every life that ever forms or even comes to be

Touches the world in some small way for all eternity.

The little one we longed for was swiftly here and gone,
But the love that was then planted is a light that still shines on.
And though our arms are empty our hearts know what to do,
Every beating of our hearts says that we love you.

Gone too soon
This was a life that hardly begun
No time to find your place in the sun
No time to do all you could have done
But we loved you enough for a lifetime.

No time to enjoy the world and its wealth
No time to take life down off the shelf
No time to sing the song of yourself
Though you had enough love for a lifetime.

Those who live long endure sadness and tears
But you'll never suffer the sorrowing years
No betrayal, no anger, no hatred, no fears
Just love, enough love for a lifetime.

Tomorrow is another day

More sunshine caressed our faces as we walked the three-mile journey into work this morning, and the week is going well so far for the Boy and I. We both feel stronger and brighter, and more like our old selves. The weekend away certainly did us the world of good. I feel tougher, braver and more able to face the world. I can talk about our baby without faltering, and think of our baby without breaking down. While the memories are predominantly painful and sad, I can also think back with a tiny sense of happiness that the Boy and I made a child together and what joy that brought us for 13 weeks.

I feel more positive about the future and after long discussions we've decided to start trying again for a family straight away, as soon as my lady has arrived. It's been three weeks now since I had the operation so that should be in the next few weeks. Hopefully it will show that my body has settled down and we can start trying to conceive again. I'm sure that will be an even more emotional process this time, riddled with doubt, hope, anxiety and optimism for a different ending. The Boy and I are able to be physically close again regularly now and that has helped me feel more settled and secure. He really is my world and being close to him gives me peace and courage.

But before we get to that point, there is tomorrow. Our darling baby Beans will be buried in Rotherhithe tomorrow morning at 8.30am. I can hardly bring myself to think about what it will be like, and how sad it will be to say a last goodbye to our first, beautiful and beloved child. I can take heart from the fact that the Boy and I go into tomorrow well prepared physically, as rested, together and united as we can be. I can also take comfort from the fact our baby will be buried in a memorial garden that we can go and visit whenever we like. I have been wondering how I can feel close to our baby on its due date, that memorable date of 1/11/11... and I think a visit to the garden could be helpful.

While I am scared and distressed at what the new day will bring, I hope tomorrow will provide a sense of calm and closure - and even relief - and that our baby can sleep peacefully in the garden and in our hearts, and we can begin to walk away and face the future and the next chapter in our lives together.

Culture of bangladesh.

Bangladesh has a long history in its culture. The land, the rivers, and the lives of the common people formed a rich heritage with marked differences from neighbouring regions. It has evolved over the centuries and encompasses the cultural diversity of several social groups of Bangladesh. The Bengal Renaissance of the 19th and early 20th centuries, noted Bengali writers, saints, authors, scientists, researchers, thinkers, music composers, painters and film-makers have played a significant role in the development of Bengali culture. The Bengal Renaissance contained the seeds of a nascent political Indian nationalism and was the precursor in many ways to modern Indian artistic and cultural expression.The culture of Bangladesh is composite and over centuries has assimilated influences of Hinduism, Jainism, Buddhism, Islam, and Christianity. It is manifested in various forms, including music, dance and drama; art and craft; folklore and folktales; languages and literature, philosophy and religion, festivals and celebrations, as also in a distinct cuisine and culinary tradition.

# Music, dance, drama and film

The music and dance styles of Bangladesh may be divided into three categories, classical, folk and modern. The classical style has been influenced by other prevalent classical forms of music and dances of the Indian subcontinent, and accordingly show some influences dance forms like Bharata Natyam and Kuchipudi. The folk and tribal music and dance forms of Bangladesh are of indigenous origin and rooted to the soil of Bangladesh. Several dancing styles in vogue in the north-eastern part of the Indian subcontinent, like Monipuri and Santal dances, are also practiced in Bangladesh, but Bangladesh has developed its own distinct dancing styles, for example Nitoshilpi.pllpBangladesh has a rich tradition of folk songs, with lyrics rooted into vibrant tradition and spirituality, mysticism and devotion. Such folk songs also revolve round several other themes, including love themes.Most prevalent of folk songs and music traditions include Bhatiali, Baul, Marfati, Murshidi and Bhawaiya. Lyricists like Lalon Shah, Hason Raja, Kangal Harinath, Romesh Shill, Abbas Uddin and many unknown anonymous lyrists have enriched the tradition of folk songs of Bangladesh.In relatively modern context, Rabindra Sangeet and Nazrul geeti form precious cultural heritage of Bangladesh. In recent time, western influences have given rise to several quality rock bands, particularly in urban centers like Dhaka.Several musical instruments, some of them of indigenous origin, are used in Bangladesh, and major musical instruments used are bamboo flute (banshi), drums (dhol), a single stringed instrument named ektara, a four stringed instrument called dotara, a pair of metal bawls used for rhythm effect called mandira[disambiguation needed]. Currently, several musical instruments of western origin like guitar, drums, and saxophone are also used, sometimes alongside the traditional instruments.

# Literature
Bangalees have a rich literary heritage. The earliest available specimen of Bengali literature is about a thousand years old. During the mediaeval period. Bengali Literature developed considerably with the patronage of Muslim rulers. Chandi Das, Daulat Kazi and Alaol are some of the famous poets of the period. The era of modern Bengali Literature began in the late nineteenth century Rabindranath Tagore, the Nobel Laureate is a vital part of Bangalee culture.  Kazi Nazrul Islam, Michael Madhusudan Datta. Sarat Chandra Chattopadhaya, Bankim Chandra Chattopadhaya, Mir Mosharraf Hossain and Kazi Ahdul Wadud are the pioneers of modern Bengali Literature.

# Pohela Boishakh
Pôhela Boishakh is the first day of the Bangla Calendar. It is usually celebrated on the 14th of April. Pohela Boishakh marks the start day of the crop season. Usually on Pôhela Boishakh, the home is thoroughly scrubbed and cleaned; people bathe early in the morning and dress in fine clothes. They spend much of the day visiting relatives, friends, and neighbours and going to fair. Fairs are arranged in many parts of the country where various agricultural products, traditional handicrafts, toys, cosmetics, as well as various kinds of food and sweets are sold. The fairs also provide entertainment, with singers, dancers and traditional plays and songs. Horse races, bull races, bullfights, cockfights, flying pigeons, boat racing were once popular. All gatherings and fairs consist a wide spread of Bengali food and sweets.The most colourful New Year's Day festival takes place in Dhaka. Large numbers of people gather early in the morning under the banyan tree at Ramna Park where Chhayanat artists open the day with Rabindranath Tagore's famous song, Esho, he Boishakh, Esho Esho (Come, Year, Come, Come). A similar ceremony welcoming the new year is also held at the Institute of Fine Arts, University of Dhaka. Students and teachers of the institute take out a colourful procession and parade round the campus. Social and cultural organisations celebrate the day with cultural programmes. Newspapers bring out special supplements. There are also special programmes on radio and television.Prior to this day, special discounts on clothes, furniture, electronics and various deals and shopping discounts are available. Special line of sarees, usually cottons, white sarees with red print/embroidery is sold before this day as everyone dresses up for this day. jasmine flowers are also a huge sale for this event which adorns the women's hair.

# Marriage, Family, and Kinship
A traditional wedding is arranged by Ghotoks (matchmakers), who are typically friends or relatives of the couple. The matchmakers facilitate the introduction, and also help agree the amount of any settlement. Bengali weddings are traditionally in five parts: first it is the bride and groom's Mehendi Shondha,the bride's Gaye Holud, the groom's Gaye Holud, the Beeya and the Bou Bhaat. These often take place on separate days. The first event in a wedding is an informal one: the groom presents the bride with a ring marking the "engagement" which is gaining popularity.For the mehendi shondha the bride's side apply henna to each other as well as the bride For the bride's Gaye Holud, the groom's family - except the groom himself - go in procession to the bride's home. Bride's friends and family apply turmeric paste to her body as a part of Gaye Hoof bride, and they are traditionally all in matching clothes, mostly orange in colour. The bride is seated on a dais, and the henna is used to decorate the bride's hands and feet with elaborate abstract designs. The sweets are then fed to the bride by all involved, piece by piece. The actual wedding ceremony "Biye" follows the Gaye Holud ceremonies. The wedding ceremony is arranged by the bride's family. On the day, the younger members of the bride's family barricade the entrance to the venue, and demand a sort of admission charge from the groom in return for allowing him to enter. The bride and groom are seated separately, and a Kaji (authorized person by the govt. to perform the wedding), accompanied by the parents and a Wakil (witness) from each side formally asks the bride for her consent to the union, and then the groom for his. The bride's side of the family tries to play some kind of practical joke on the groom such as stealing the groom's shoe.The reception, also known as Bou-Bhat (reception), is a party given by the groom's family in return for the wedding party. It is typically a much more relaxed affair, with only the second-best wedding outfit being worn.

# Religion in Bangladesh
Bangladesh is ethnically homogeneous, with Bengalis comprising 98% of the population. The majority of Bangladeshis (about 90%) are Muslims, and a small number of Hindus, Christians and Buddhists are also in the country. But due to immense cultural diversity, multiple dialects, hybridization of social traits and norms as well as cultural upbringing, Bangladeshis cannot be stereotyped very easily, except for the only fact that they are very resilient in nature.People of different religions perform their religious rituals with festivity in Bangladesh. The Government has declared National Holidays on all important religious festivals of the four major religions. Durga Puja, Christmas and Buddha Purnima are celebrated with enthusiasm in Bangladesh. All of these form an integral part of the cultural heritage of Bangladesh.

# Bengali food
Bangladesh is famous for its distinctive culinary tradition, and delicious food, snacks and savories. Boiled rice constitutes the staple food, and is served with a variety of vegetables, fried as well as curries, thick lentil soups, and fish and meat preparations of beef, mutton and chicken.Sweetmeats of Bangladesh are mostly milk based, and consist of several delights including Roshgulla, Sandesh, Rasamalai, Gulap Jamun, Kalo Jamun, Chom Chom. Several other sweet preparations are also available.Bengali cuisine is rich and varied with the use of many specialized spices and flavours.Fish is the dominant source of protein, cultivated in ponds and fished with nets in the fresh-water rivers of the Ganges delta. More than forty types of mostly freshwater fish are common, including carp varieties like rui (rohu), katla, magur (catfish), chingŗi (prawn or shrimp), as well as shuţki (dried sea fish). Salt water fish (not sea fish though) Ilish (hilsa ilisha) is very popular among Bengalis, can be called an icon of Bengali cuisine.

# Dress
Bangladeshi people have unique dress preferences. Bangladeshi men wear panjabi on religious and cultural occasions, lungi as casual wear and shirt-pant on formal occasions. Shari is the main dress of Bangladeshi women. Sari weaving is a traditional art in Bangladesh. Shalwar Kamij is quite popular, especially among younger women. Some women in urban areas also wear pants, skirts and tops.

Sport in Bangladesh
# Cricket
Cricket is a game which has a massive and passionate following in Bangladesh. There is a strong domestic league which on many occasions also saw players from foreign countries gracing the cricket fields of Bangladesh.Bangladesh received it's test status from ICC in 2000, which is a requirement for the countries to play Test cricket. The Bangladesh national cricket team's official logo is Royal Bengal Tiger, by which they are often referred at media.The cricketing culture is not a new phenomenon in Bangladesh. Similar to other subcontinental countries, the game itself was first introduced to the Ganges-Brahmaputra delta region by the British rulers nearly two centuries ago. For the better part of the British rule, cricket remained a recreational game for the aristocrats, inaccessible to the common people because of colonial class distinctions and the complicated nature of the game which the locals were not able to comprehend easily. Following the liberation war which ended in Bangladesh gaining independence in 1971, cricketing popularity has continued to grow.The Bangladesh Cricket team is coached by Australian Jamie Siddons. Often criticized for their poor performances but have beaten all the test playing nations once or twice in ODI (One Day International) matches. Bangladesh most recently enjoyed a good run of form, defeating New Zealand 4-0 in a 5 match ODI series held in Mirpur, Dhaka. Bangladesh will also be one of the hosts of the 2011 Cricket World Cup.[2] They currently hold 8th spot in the ODI and Test ICC world rankings.

# Football

Football is popular in Bangladesh. Bangladesh is currently ranked 150th in the FIFA ranking. Bangladesh became the 2003 South Asian Football Federation (SAFF) champion. SAFF includes Southern Asian countries and other countries from Asia.The Bangladesh national football team is controlled by the national governing body, the Bangladesh Football Federation, which is a member of the AFC. The side has yet to qualify for a FIFA World Cup tournament. They were eliminated in the first round of their only Asian Cup appearance to date in 1980. As is the case elsewhere on the subcontinent, the national football team stands somewhat in the shadow of the country's Test cricket team. The team was founded in 1972, and joined FIFA in 1974.Apart from wins over Indonesia and Thailand in their first ever World Cup qualification in 1986, Bangladesh has struggled to impose itself. At the regional level, they have also remained in the second echelon while in Asia, the team is constantly trying to avoid being the wooden spoon of their group.Football in Bangladesh has a huge following which was exemplified when the national team made history in their victory at the South Asian Football Federation Cup in 2003. The South Asia side won the final via penalties over Maldives before 50,000 home supporters.Kazi Salahuddin is Bangladesh's most famous footballer, having played professional football in Hong Kong, the first Bangldeshi player to ever do so.Another famous player is Chingla Mong Chowdhury Murruy. He is a renowned soccer personality in Bangladesh. He used to play before the liberation war. He coached BRTC, was an assistant coach for BKSP. He also received his national award in football. He fought in the Liberation War in 1971 for his country.

Country living

I'm pleased to report that our mini-break in the country did us the world of good, and helped strengthen us both after the difficulties of last week. While both the Boy and I are aware that we have an incredibly challenging week ahead of us, we are going into it as as united and as bright as we can be. The contrast to how I feel now, compared to last Monday after the wedding, is palpable. It's reminded me how important it is to look after myself and to take the quiet time that I need now to heal. It's also reminded me that it's ok to put myself first and to to say no to say to events if they feel too much, to ensure the Boy and I get the private space we need to begin to recover. It heals my soul being with him and doing 'normal' things like this - and I want to be selfish now and make sure I get enough of that.

The hotel - Down Hall - was lovely. Only a 40 minute train journey from London but it felt like we were miles and miles away. The weather was very kind to us, and we spent the day in the sunshine enjoying the hotel grounds - the large outdoor chess set was a favourite (especially as I won, not that I'm ribbing the Boy too much about that...), closely followed by boules. We enjoyed walking in the wild parkland and forest around the hotel, taking in the nature and enjoying the scenery. We are both keen photographers and we found more than enough flora and fauna to capture to remind us of the break. The rose garden was particularly beautiful, and also restorative - I am finding a real sense of calm in nature.

It was a relief to be able to just 'be'. To be me and the Boy doing what we do, without being weighed down by the grief which has consumed and gripped us at times over the past few weeks. Wandering around hand-in-hand in new scenery, exploring together and taking in different sights and sounds gave me a feeling of freedom that was well needed. We were able to laugh together and make our own fun, which was a very welcome tonic. Sitting on the terrace in the late afternoon sunshine enjoying a few cool drinks and feeling the warmth on our faces, I felt another surge of hope. It's so sad now and my heart breaks for our little lost baby Beans, but I know it won't always be this way. I'm beginning to feel that the Boy and I could be in the sun again soon, and I am beginning to believe that we might be lucky enough to fall pregnant again and this time the ending might be different. I know it might not, but for now the fact it might be feels enough and reassures me.

We had secured a deal with the hotel which included champagne in the room which we very much enjoyed. There is something very decadent about drinking champagne for no reason, and while I felt a little guilty having a 'celebratory' drink when we have suffered such a lot, it brought a smile to my face and set the tone for a lovely evening. We also had a meal in the restaurant included that was lovely, and the drinks flowed through the evening as we enjoyed more of the hotel games, included snooker and Connect Four.

Again, it was great to be able to relax together and enjoy normal activities, without feeling troubled or weighed down by our worries and sadness. At times since lost the baby I have felt like a hunch back I have been carrying so much with me, like one of those bent over stick people on the road sign that warns for old people ahead. It felt such a release to have good times together. There have certainly not been many of those in recent times, and while they are still more fleeting than the bad times it reminds us they will come aplenty again.

I started to feel this weekend that it's ok to begin to move on. I've felt some shades of guilt about letting go of baby Beans, and while there were still glimpses of that over the weekend, I am beginning to accept what has happened and take in our loss. I imagine I will ache for some time yet to come - and I dread how Wednesday will be - but maybe it's ok to have that ache there and that longing for things to have been different, but at the same time to look forwards as well as backwards too...?

Bangladesh.

Bangladesh officially the People's Republic of Bangladesh (Bangla: গণপ্রজাতন্ত্রী বাংলাদেশ Gônoprojatontri Bangladesh) is a sovereign state located in South Asia. It is bordered by India on all sides except for a small border with Burma (Myanmar) to the far southeast and by the Bay of Bengal to the south. Together with the Indian state of West Bengal, it makes up the ethno-linguistic region of Bengal. The name Bangladesh means "Country of Bengal" in the official Bengali language.

The borders of present-day Bangladesh were established with the partition of Bengal and India in 1947, when the region became East Pakistan, part of the newly formed nation of Pakistan. However, it was separated from the western wing by 1,600 km (994 mi) of Indian territory. Due to political exclusion, ethnic and linguistic discrimination, and economic neglect by the politically-dominant West Pakistan, popular agitation grew against West Pakistan and led to the Bangladesh Liberation War in 1971, which the Bengali people won with the support of India. After independence, the new state endured famines, natural disasters and widespread poverty, as well as political turmoil and military coups. The restoration of democracy in 1991 has been followed by relative calm and economic progress.Bangladesh is a secular republic and a parliamentary democracy, with an elected parliament called the Jatiyo Sangshad. It is the eighth most populous country and among the most densely populated countries in the world. A high poverty rate prevails, although the United Nations has acclaimed Bangladesh for achieving tremendous progress in human development.Geographically, the country straddles the fertile Ganges-Brahmaputra Delta and is subject to annual monsoon floods and cyclones.The country is listed among the Next Eleven economies and Global Growth Generator countries. It is a founding member of the South Asian Association for Regional Cooperation, the D-8 and BIMSTEC, and a member of the Commonwealth of Nations, the Organisation of the Islamic Conference and the Non-Aligned Movement. However, Bangladesh continues to face a number of major challenges, including widespread political and bureaucratic corruption, economic competition relative to the world, serious overpopulation, widespread poverty, and an increasing danger of hydrologic shocks brought on by ecological vulnerability to climate change.

# History
The history of Bangladesh as a nation state began in 1971, when it seceded from Pakistan. Prior to the creation of Pakistan in 1947, modern-day Bangladesh was part of ancient, classical, medieval and colonial India.The area's early history featured a succession of Indian empires, internal squabbling, and a tussle between Hinduism and Buddhism for dominance. Islam made its first appearance during the 12th century when Sufi missionaries arrived. Later, occasional Muslim raiders reinforced the process of conversion by building mosques, madrassas and Sufi Khanqah.The borders of present-day Bangladesh were established with the partition of Bengal and India in 1947, when the region became East Pakistan, part of the newly formed Islamic State of Pakistan. However, it was separated from the western wing by 1,600 km (994 mi) of Indian territory. Due to political exclusion, ethnic and linguistic discrimination, as well as economic neglect by the politically-dominant West Pakistan, popular agitation led by Sheikh Mujibur Rahman grew against West Pakistan, resulting in the Bangladesh Liberation War of 1971, which the Bengali people won with the support of India. After independence, the new state endured famine, natural disasters and widespread poverty, as well as political turmoil and military coups. The restoration of democracy in 1991 has been followed by relative calm and economic progress.

# The Bengali Language Movement
The Bengali Language Movement, also known as the Language Movement Bhasha Andolon, was a political effort in Bangladesh (then known as East Pakistan), advocating the recognition of the Bengali language as an official language of Pakistan. Such recognition would allow Bengali to be used in government affairs.When the state of Pakistan was formed in 1947, its two regions, East Pakistan (also called East Bengal) and West Pakistan, were split along cultural, geographical, and linguistic lines. In 1948, the Government of Pakistan ordained Urdu as the sole national language, sparking extensive protests among the Bengali-speaking majority of East Pakistan. Facing rising sectarian tensions and mass discontent with the new law, the government outlawed public meetings and rallies. The students of the University of Dhaka and other political activists defied the law and organised a protest on 21 February 1952. The movement reached its climax when police killed student demonstrators on that day. The deaths provoked widespread civil unrest led by the Awami Muslim League, later renamed the Awami League. After years of conflict, the central government relented and granted official status to the Bengali language in 1956. In 2000, UNESCO declared 21 February International Mother Language Day for the whole world to celebrate,in tribute to the Language Movement and the ethno-linguistic rights of people around the world.The Language Movement catalysed the assertion of Bengali national identity in Pakistan, and became a forerunner to Bengali nationalist movements, including the 6-point movement and subsequently the Bangladesh Liberation War in 1971. In Bangladesh, 21 February is observed as Language Movement Day, a national holiday. The Shaheed Minar monument was constructed near Dhaka Medical College in memory of the movement and its victims.

# Divisions, districts and upazilas
Bangladesh is divided into seven administrative divisions,[43][44] each named after their respective divisional headquarters: Barisal (বরিশাল), Chittagong (চট্টগ্রাম), Dhaka (ঢাকা), Khulna (খুলনা), Rajshahi (রাজশাহী), Sylhet (সিলেট), and Rangpur (রংপুর).
Divisions are subdivided into districts (zila). There are 64 districts in Bangladesh, each further subdivided into upazila (subdistricts) or thana. The area within each police station, except for those in metropolitan areas, is divided into several unions, with each union consisting of multiple villages. In the metropolitan areas, police stations are divided into wards, which are further divided into mahallas. There are no elected officials at the divisional, district or upazila levels, and the administration is composed only of government officials. Direct elections are held for each union (or ward), electing a chairperson and a number of members. In 1997, a parliamentary act was passed to reserve three seats (out of 12) in every union for female candidates.Dhaka is the capital and largest city of Bangladesh. Other major cities include Chittagong, Khulna, Rajshahi, Sylhet, Barisal, Bogra, Comilla, Mymensingh and Rangpur. These cities have mayoral elections, while other municipalities elect a chairperson. Mayors and chairpersons are elected for a span of five years.

# Geography and climate
Bangladesh lies between latitudes 20° and 27°N, and longitudes 88° and 93°E.
Bangladesh is in the low-lying Ganges–Brahmaputra River Delta or Ganges Delta. This delta is formed by the confluence of the Ganges (local name Padma or Pôdda), Brahmaputra (Jamuna or Jomuna also known as "Yamuna"), and Meghna rivers and their respective tributaries. The Ganges unites with the Jamuna (main channel of the Brahmaputra) and later joins the Meghna to eventually empty into the Bay of Bengal. The alluvial soil deposited by these rivers has created some of the most fertile plains in the world. Bangladesh has 57 trans-boundary rivers, making water issues politically complicated to resolve – in most cases as the lower riparian state to India. Most parts of Bangladesh are less than 12 m (39.4 ft) above the sea level, and it is believed that about 10% of the land would be flooded if the sea level were to rise by 1 m (3.28 ft).
In south east Bangladesh experiments have been done since the sixties to 'build with nature'. By implementing cross dams, the natural accretion of silt has created new land. With Dutch funding, the Bangladeshi government began to help develop this new land in the late 1970s. The effort has since become a multiagency operation building roads, culverts, embankments, cyclone shelters, toilets and ponds, as well as distributing land to settlers. By fall 2010, the program will have allotted some 27,000 acres (10,927 ha) to 21,000 families.The highest point in Bangladesh is in Mowdok range at 1,052 m (3,451 ft) in the Chittagong Hill Tracts to the southeast of the country. Cox's Bazar, south of the city of Chittagong, has a beach that stretches uninterrupted over 120 kilometres (75 mi).
Straddling the Tropic of Cancer, Bangladeshi climate is tropical with a mild winter from October to March, a hot, humid summer from March to June. A warm and humid monsoon season lasts from June to October and supplies most of the country's rainfall. Natural calamities, such as floods, tropical cyclones, tornadoes, and tidal bores occur almost every year,[51] combined with the effects of deforestation, soil degradation and erosion. The cyclones of 1970 and 1991 were particularly devastating. A cyclone that struck Bangladesh in 1991 killed some 140,000 people.In September 1998, Bangladesh saw the most severe flooding in modern world history. As the Brahmaputra, the Ganges and Meghna spilt over and swallowed 300,000 houses, 9,700 kilometres (6,027 mi) of road and 2,700 kilometres (1,678 mi) of embankment 1,000 people were killed and 30 million more were made homeless with 135,000 cattle killed, 50 square kilometres (19.3 sq mi) of land destroyed and 11,000 kilometres (6,835 mi) of roads damaged or destroyed. Two-thirds of the country was underwater. There were several reasons for the severity of the flooding. Firstly, there were unusually high monsoon rains. Secondly, the Himalayas shed off an equally unusually high amount of melt water that year. Thirdly, trees that usually would have intercept rain water had been cut down for firewood or to make space for animals.Bangladesh is now widely recognized to be one of the countries most vulnerable to climate change. Natural hazards that come from increased rainfall, rising sea levels, and tropical cyclones are expected to increase as climate change, each seriously affecting agriculture, water & food security, human health and shelter. It is believed that in the coming decades the rising sea level alone will create more than 20 million climate refugees.Bangladeshi water is contaminated with arsenic frequently because of the high arsenic contents in the soil. Up to 77 million people are exposed to toxic arsenic from drinking water.Bangladesh is among the countries most prone to natural floods, tornados and cyclones.

## National symbols of Bangladesh

• Anthem      Amar Shonar Bangla
• Animal       Royal Bengal Tiger
• Bird          Oriental Magpie Robin
• Fish          Hilsa
• Flower      White Water Lily
• Fruit         Jack fruit
• Tree          Mango Tree
• Sport         Hadudu
• Calendar   Bengali calendar

# Data Sources:wikipedia.org